Somthing's not right in your relationship and you can't put your finder on it. Below is a list of RED FLAGS or behaviors common in men who abuse their girlfreiend, wives or partners. Be on the alert and WATCH OUT. Don't put yourself and/or your children at risk!

JEALOUSY

An abuser says his jealousy is a sign of love. Jealousy has NOTHING to do with love. It is a sign of insecurity and possessiveness. He calls constantly and drops by unexpectedly. He resents time spent with family, questions all relationships and accuses you of having someone else. May even check the mileage on your car.

QUICK INVOLVEMENT

Comes on like whirlwind claiming, "I've never felt like this before." The abuser pressures the woman for an exclusive relationship as soon as possible.

CONTROLLING

At first, the batterer will say this behaviour is becasue he is concerned about you. As time goes on, he interrogates you intensely(especially if you're late) about whom you've talked to and where you were, keeps all the money and insists you ask permission to go anywhere or do anything. May keep al the money and insists you ask permission to go anywhere or do anything. My keep you from making any personal decisions.

UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

Expects you to be the perfect woman and meet his every need. He is very dependent on the woman.

ISOLATION

He tries to cut you off from family and friends and accuses people who are your support system of being "trouble makers." He may deprive you of a phone or car or try to keep you from having a job. He may insults to cut you off from anyone but him.

BLAMES OTHERS FOR HIS PROBLEMS AND MISTAKES

Other people are the ones at fault and responsible for anything and everything that goes wrong in his life... the boss, you, your mother, your friends, etc.

MAKES EVERYONE ELSE RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS FEELINGS

"You make me angry." instead of "I am angry." or "Your 'e hurting me by not doing what I ask."

HYPERSENSITIVITY

The abuser is easily insulted, claiming his feelings are hurt when he is really mad. He takes the slightest setback or comment as a personal attack. Hell rant and rave about things common in life - being asked to work overtime or getting a ticket.

CRUELTY TO ANIMALS AND TO CHILDREN

Kills or punishes animals brutally. Also, he may expect children to do things far beyond their ability or may tease them until they cry. Sixty-five percent of men who beat their partners also abuse their children.

PLAYFUL USE OF FORCE DURING SEX

Enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will during sex or forcing sex when you don't want it.

VERBAL ABUSE

Constantly criticizes, or says blatantly cruel, hurtful things, degrades, curses, calls you ugly names. This may include keeping you up so you can't sleep at night.

RIGID SEX ROLES

The abuser expects you to serve, obey without question and to stay at home. He expects you to be happy for his successes but is jealousy of any of yours.

SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS

Switches from loving to explosively violent in a matter of minutes.

PAST BATTERING

Often the batterer will admit hitting women in the past but says they made him do it. If he's had past relationships, he's probably abused those women, as well.

THREATS of VIOLENCE

The abuser makes statements like, "I'll break your neck," or "I'll kill you." He may then dismiss them saying everyone talks tat way or he didn't mean it.

If he threatens you, take him seriously!!! Get help or get out!